“Successor? No I’ve never considered who my successor will be. You are aware that we will be immortal do you not Dyrena?”

“Need I point out that the gods are immortal as well, Vaingloth? Or that our entire scheme hinges on the assumption that said status is not an irrevocable one?”

“Pah. All the more reason to have no successors available.”

“You would have your vision fall to ruin when you do? But what of your special people? The ones you will shepherd into our new age?”

“I detect more than a hint of sarcasm in your question, Dyrena.”

“Why Vaingloth? When have I ever been sarcastic? Surely not about this enterprise. Why it shall place us into a new and eternal golden age will it not.”

“The eternal gold age shall be our eternal golden age. We will be its masters and, unlike the foolish deities we must contend with, we shall not allow for conditions which might unseat us, having learned from the openings we will use.”

“Perhaps. That is the structure of the scheme I suppose. But I must also question what should happen if we were to grow tired out of our positions? At some point, however far in the future that might be, certainly we will have done all that we care to do. Best I think to have an idea for how a transition of power might be arranged, lest we be caught cobbling something together when our interest in this world has waned to its utmost nadir.”

“Best not to, I assure you. Constructing an avenue by which our powers may be inherited will do nothing but provide an incentive for those who stand to gain that inheritance to hasten it’s coming.”

“But certainly if we attempt to hold our power close forever, there will be those who nibble away at it, or find the fragments we leave laying around to use against us?”

“I, for one, will be leaving none of my fragments in reach of anyone save myself.”

“We shall need to certain Draconia is among the first defeated then if you intend to assemble a hoard of your own.”

“I have Sasarai working on that as we speak.”

“Intriguing. Shall I offer to review his Sacred Geometeries?”

“No, I’m sure…okay, I can’t say that. Yes, please do. We’ve all seen his work before.”

– Dyrena convincing Vaingloth and, indirectly, the other Neoterics of the value of creating secret hoards for the divine fragments they meant to harvest.

Mt. Gloria looked weird. A sprawling city laid out around a mountain wasn’t so different from the Garden but the almost complete lack of anything growing was just unnatural. How were people supposed to live without space to grown food?

The former Lord had specialized farm areas built beneath ground and then piped in light and heat to them, Umbrielle said.

“That seems like a lot of work when he just could have…” I started to say and then ran into a limit to my thoughts of having grown up in the Garden.

What could he had done without his own Mazana to provide light and heat?

“It’s worse than you’re thinking,” Theia said. “Whatever you have to say to Little, I’d suggest not mentioning ‘Kindling’ to her.”

“Why?”

“That’s what Vaingloth used the people of Mt. Gloria for,” Theia said. 

“Wait, he burned up people to heat the city for people? How? That could never work?”

He wasn’t burning them to heat the city. He had a portal to the plane of Fire for that. He claimed he was burning people to keep the portal open when he was just using that as a means to harvest their grace, Umbrielle said.

Hmm, similar to what Sasarai does in the Roots, though a bit more direct, Draconia said.

Somehow the death of nearly everyone in the would-that-was had less impact for me. They were too remote, and too numerous, their deaths too unspecific for any of that to evoke more than an intellectual level of revulsion. The idea of lighting people on fire was one my imagination was disturbingly capable of providing imagery for however, and the connection to the deaths in the roots of the Holy Tree made them too real for me to brush aside.

“I’m glad he’s dead,” I said, my stomach fully turned at the thought of how awful the Neoterics could be.

We are as well. An unmistakable voice said as I flew in close enough to be fully illuminated over the city. 

The Sun was speaking to me and her splendor and majesty was nearly overwhelming.

Sola! Draconia was as delighted as I was overwhelmed. How did so much of you survive!

Oh, I very much didn’t, Sola said. What you see now is the result of a lot of work reassembling the bits of me we could find. My Blessed is rather exceptional in that, and so much of this is thanks to her.

“Can we meet her?” I asked. “I think I may have set some things in motion that are going to impact, uh, well everyone.”

Things? Such as? Sola asked.

“I claimed all of the divine fragments the First Tender, err, Sasarai held as my own,” I said. “He’s going to be coming for the ones that are here, and so are the others.”

You…you took little Sasarai’s stolen fragments from him? Without him knowing? Oh! OH! And you’re the Blessed of Draconia, so he can’t….

I wasn’t aware that the Sun was capable of breaking down into gales of crippling laughter. She tried to speak a few more times but wasn’t able to get any words past the fit of giggles that gripped her.

“We should probably head to the castle,” Theia said.

I nodded, which she could at least feel if not see directly. It made sense that we’d find the Sun Queen in the highest room of the palace after all.

And there again I was mislead by my time in the Garden.

We landed on the highest open terrace I could find only to discover that the Sun Queen was not in residence. I had to shift back to my Sylvan form in order to fit on the balcony that had seemed the most promising spot, which left Theia clinging to me until she was sure of her footing. The temptation to switch back to dragon form was oddly strong but I pushed it aside. As…comfortable as that might have been, we had work to do, and danger to warn about.

“You’re here to see Little?” the fox woman who spoke appeared in a rush of wind which could not have been coincidental. 

“Hiya Zeph,” Theia said. “Meet our newest Blessed. Jilly, Blessed of Guardians and Treasures, meet Zeph Foxwind, Honor Guard to the Sun.”

I noticed an important distinction in the introduction there. Zeph wasn’t the Honor Guard to the Sun Queen. She was an Honor Guard of the Sun itself.

I had no idea what a Foxwind was, but Draconia’s gifts to my sense were telling me in no uncertain terms that the woman I was looking at was not of the same mortal stock as the rest of us.

“A pleasure to meet you Blessed Jilya. You seem to have amused my mistress greatly, but I imagine your haste stems from a more pressing source?” For all the speed with which she’d joined us, Zeph was remarkably calm and unhurried in her speech.

“It does,” I said. “Would I be able to speak to the Sun Queen? I think she needs to hear what we’ve done and discovered as soon as possible.”

“The who?” Zeph asked.

“Oh, I’m sorry Jilya,” Theia said. “Little doesn’t go by any titles like that.”

It was Zeph’s turn to be amused, though unlike Sola, she constrained her mirth to a wry little smile.

“No, no,” Zeph said. “I’ll be happy to take you to the Sun Queen. She is going to be delighted with that title.”

“Um, I’m sorry, I just thought…” I wasn’t sure what I thought. Except that of course anyone in charge of a city must have some suitable grandiose title to go along with it. 

Damn you Sasarai. 

Clearly the heaviest of his many crimes, Draconia said.

You too? I asked, affronted at the betrayal from my own god. Affronted and, of course, comforted. If Draconia was willing to joke about something then it couldn’t be that serious.

I can ask her to return to the palace? Sola said, having regained control of herself.

“I can get her,” Zeph said.

Or you could all remember that I can hear you as well, Little said, her voice distant but not impossibly so. I can head back in a few minutes, let me just wrap up the discussion I’m having with the builders here or they’ll be stuck for days.

“Why don’t we come to you?” I suggested.

That would be ideal if you could, Little said. There’s a prayer group that I wanted to check in on and I think they would be delighted to meet a new Blessed.

“I know where that is,” Zeph said. “We can meet you there.”

“We should walk,” Theia said. “This is the first city Jilya’s had a chance to really see.”

“I think we need to hurry,” I said, feeling the impending approach of the Neoterics like a new doom about to collide with the world.

“We will, but I think I know what you’re looking for now, and walking the city is going to be something we need to do to find it.”

I was about to argue when I stopped to consider who Theia was blessed by.

As the Blessed of Night, or even just a specific aspect of Night, also known as the god who saved the world by hiding it from a power beyond even divine might, Theia should have been able to sense where our quarry lay as a simple part of her domain.

Kalkit as well, as the Blessed of Secrets, should have known of its existence the moment they received their first gifts.

So how had I worked it out?

Well, my god is better than theirs.

I’m not supposed to approve of that sort of thinking, Draconia said in an approving tone.

To be fair, I couldn’t sense what we needed to find, but I knew we could find it somewhere in Mt Gloria.

And Theia’s words made sense. Even letting Little know what I’d discovered wasn’t going to change the need to explore until we proved out my hypothesis.

“Lead on!” I said, falling into step behind Zeph.

Theia took up a position beside me and bumped my shoulder with hers.

“Bet you didn’t think you’d wind up here when you started looking for me?”

“I didn’t know here existed, so, yes, that’s a safe bet,” I said.

“No. I meant working together,” she said and bumped me again.

I almost stopped at that, the whiplash of recalling what I’d been thinking and feeling almost snapping my brain.

“I wouldn’t be here without you.” I think I whispered the words.

“Looking for an apology?” Theia asked, her voice light with a hint of challenge in it.

“What? No. I mean I wouldn’t be alive if it wasn’t for you,” I said, a new idea running through my head.

Dyrena had left plans in place to guide the course the world would take when she “left”.

I know Helgon was convinced she was dead, and that might be true, at least for some definitions of ‘dead’. Given that he was dead and yet still quite chatty and involved in the world’s current affairs, I wasn’t convinced that death meant quite the same thing to them as it did to the rest of us.

The important thing though was that Dyrena’s plans for the world had to include responses to someone doing what I had done. That it had been possible for me meant it was inevitable that someone would have managed it eventually.

But I’d only been in a position to take Sasarai’s divine fragment collection because Theia had been with me. 

And for as good at hiding as I was, I’d also been moving closer and closer into Sasarai’s orbit with my training and my insistence on being a pure and perfect member of Mazana’s clergy. I’d been wildly successful in hiding my Blessed state but the moment Sasarai had been given reason to really pay attention to me, I would have died then and there.

And Theia had saved me from that.

No. She’d done more than save me. 

I was finally who I really was because of her.

But it hadn’t been her idea to be where she was.

She’d been sent there.

That did stop me.

“Theia,” I asked. “Who are you working for?”

“So the plan is that we will all harvest the fragments of the deities with temples nearest to our sanctuary cities?”

“Yes Helgon, that is what we’ve been discussing for the last hour and a half.”

“My apologies Vaingloth, I have been working on a theorem to predict the distribution of divine fragments and it seems that proximity to a temple will have less than a three percent impact on the scatter radius of fragments under all but the most extreme of edge cases. In fact, if you look here, you’ll see that the greatest correlation in fragment distribution is…”

“Helgon, we all acknowledge that you received top marks in Aetherodynamics and Transubstantiation Processes…”

“Not to mention Grace Fluidity and Philosophical Remanifestation Continuum Calculus!”

“Yes. Yes, we are ALL aware of your credentials. In this SPECIFIC case however, the research we commissioned clearly shows that the divine essences will seek to ground themselves out in the most aligned temples to the domains involved.”

“Well that’s just foolish, the research is clearly wrong. Who did we have working on it?”

“The Sightbound Sages of Skysden.”

“How sad. Their standards have clearly slipped. Did we pay them much? Can we get a refund is so?”

“No, we can’t…what makes you think you know more than an academy of Enlightened Sages?”

“Well, because they’re wrong, clearly.”

“They are wrong because you have a theory?”

“No. I have a theorem.”

“That you cobbled together in an hour while we in a discussion?”

“It was an hour and a half you said, and I must confess I wasn’t paying much attention.”

“Helgon, we do not have time for this. We have a study, backed by data, and the testimony of learned men with ten times the experience you possess.”

“You’d think they wouldn’t have made a mistake like that then. Did someone perhaps pay them to bias the study? I mean, if you wish, certainly found your cities in proximity to the great Temples, I just thought we might arrive at an imbalanced equilibrium between us if we were to neglect considerations regarding the Blessed of the Gods, which is where any remaining shards will be making their homes.”

– The High Accessors being convinced to ensure that the Blessed are preserved beyond the Sunfall.

I wasn’t leaving my brother behind. I mean, yes, I was flying away from Helgon’s city as fast as Draconia’s wings could carry me, but, importantly, Kam was still mine.

Hey, my dearest brother! Can you hear me?

“What the hell?” Kam was speaking aloud, I could tell that even though I was only hearing his voice because he was thinking his words as well.

How did I know I could read Kam’s mind? I didn’t. And I couldn’t. I could just give him my words, and listen for the ones he wanted to give me. I couldn’t know what he was really thinking about anything and I very much did not want to. The connection we shared was amazing, thanks to Draconia’s gifts, but being privy to whatever random nonsense was bouncing around his head sounded like an excellent method for driving both of us insane.

I need to get to Mt Gloria, pretty much immediately, I said, trusting that the increasing distance between us was only physical and would do nothing to diminish my words.

“Wait, what?” He was confused, which, sure, that was a sensible reaction. 

Remember how I pulled you out of the First Tender’s execution room? Same idea, but this is just words.

“Oh, yeah, that makes sense. Okay, so you’re going to Mt. Gloria. Do you need to see Mom and Dad?” 

“No. They don’t want me anymore and that’s fine.” It was not fine. “No, I need to see Little.”

“Theia’s asking why you’re going to Mt. Gloria. Oh and Xalaria doesn’t look happy.”

Can you relay this for me then, tell them that there are plans in motion that the other Neoterics are going to notice really soon and we need to get ahead of them while there’s still time.”

“Okay, sure.” The fact that he seemed to understand what I was saying felt deceptive. I had the strong suspicion that he was simply accepting what I was saying and happy to pass along whatever I told him. 

Would he have questioned me if I said something completely ridiculous? Maybe? Probably not though. I think his response to all of belief falling apart, was to shrug and decide that if it didn’t effect him in the moment, then it wasn’t worth caring about.

Or maybe that was just how I wanted to be?

“They’re asking what plans you’re talking about?” Kam said and then added “Oh and Theia’s asking if you want her to go with you?”

That would have been great but I’m pretty far away already. Draconia’s no slouch when it comes to flying.

There were dangers in the world, quite a lot of what Sasarai had told us about the wastelands were true. Draconia could sense that so clearly that even I was picking up the shades of spirits that hungered for whatever they could take from us. Turning back might have sheltered us from them, but I couldn’t be sure how quickly the window that I saw would close, especially with Sasarai hellbent on reclaiming the powers I’d claimed from him.

“Umm, she wants to know if its dark where you are?” Kam asked.

The sky above me held no luminous branches, no leaves with even the barest comforting glow. I’d read of the stars which once graced the night sky but only empty shadows remained where they’d once shone. 

Far off in the distance though, there was light.

A still living sun.

My guidepost and goal.

It’s so dark I don’t think even a Neoteric could see me up here, I said, fairly certain they’d have other means of locating me. I beat my wings faster, placing my hope in sheer speed to deliver me beyond their immediate grasp.

I wasn’t fast enough to escape someone catching me though.

Wisely, I didn’t roll or kick when I felt a pair of arm locked around my neck.

Was this your idea or hers? Umbrielle asked Draconia.

Entirely hers, Draconia said with no small bit of satisfaction drowning her words.

And you, of course, did all you could to dissuade her and convince of a more reasonable course of action? Umbrielle wasn’t asking a question because she very clearly already knew the answer.

This IS the reasonable course of action, I said and added, Thanks for coming though.

Have I ever given the impression that I like missing out on the fun? Theia asked.

This may not be fun. This may be pretty awful in fact. I said, all-to-easily imagining how badly things could go if the Sun Queen of Mt. Gloria didn’t believe me, or if she even questioned me long enough for Sasarai to strike.

All the more reason not to miss out, Theia said. With her clutched tight to my back, I could sense some of the emotions radiating off her.

Excitement. Concern. Irritation.

It would have been nice to be able to discern where those were directed by my senses weren’t quite that good, and Draconia’s domains didn’t include much in terms of emotional analysis.

How did you get here? I asked instead, guessing that was a safer subject to broach.

You’ve seen me step through shadows, she said, a questioning note in her voice as to why I would even need to have asked in the first place.

I thought you had limited range with that?

I do, but distance is dependent on a lot things. 

“Xalaria is asking what you’re doing,” Kam said and then amended his statement. “Sorry, she’s asking for exactly what you’re doing. Also, I’m supposed to tell you that we’re heading towards the trains and we’ll be in Mt. Gloria as soon as the fast line can get us there.”

Make sure Xalaria keeps you with them, I said. You’re the only one who can communicate between us at the moment.

“Yes! I’ve got a job!” That he sounded legitimately delighted about that was both endearing and idiotic. “Oh, Xalaria still wants to know what you’re doing. Exactly what you’re doing.”

Is Helgon with you?

“Yeah, should he be?” Kam asked.

I can travel outside my city now, at least along these rail lines, but my capabilities are rather limited here, Helgon said, speaking in the same silent space the gods and the Blessed used.

Which was chilling.

Oh, don’t worry, I can only do this because I’m with your brother, Helgon said. The others have no connection to you or him, so they have no presence here.

What about Sasarai? We were both part of the Garden since we were born, I asked.

Oh Sasarai could easily use one his divine fragments to…oh dear, he seems to have misplaced those hasn’t he? Such a shame. I mean all that power and no means to focus it beyond his own silly little skills, which always ran more towards compulsions and personal enhancement than I ever thought was sensible. Did he even once listen to me in that regards though? No, no I assure you he did not.

I felt the chill within me begin to thaw. It was at least a little amusing that I’d managed to take from Sasarai the things that would have prevented me from taking things from him. Given that he was nothing like a worthy Guardian however, that felt so properly within our domain that neither Draconia nor I held even the slightest of regrets.

Could you explain to the others what you told me, I asked.

I would be delighted to, though I must confess I am far from certain what I said which led you to flee my presence to quickly?

I didn’t…No Helgon, I wasn’t running from you I’m running towards what you spoke about.

But we were speaking of Dyrena and I can assure you she is not to be found at Mt. Gloria. She is not to be found anywhere on this world I am sad to say.

Part of me shared his sorrow at her loss. Despite having never met her, and very much despite her playing a key role in the destruction of the old world, I regretted that I’d never get to meet a woman who was not only held in such fond regard more than a century after her passing, but also a woman who seemed to be very likely the reason there still was a world and people upon it, rather than the emptiness of oblivion from a failed attempt at usurping divine power.

Another part of me was delighted by Helgon’s words though.

If even someone as close to Dyrena as he’d been couldn’t see what I had, then maybe there was some hope that the other Neoterics, aside from Sasarai, weren’t hot on our heels.

They would be of course.

If I was right, we were about to wake up every Neoteric in the world.

The fact that such an awakening would be best described as ‘apocalyptic’ was only tempered by the landscape below me already having been ravaged by a world ending apocalypse. 

Things were going to get bad, but there were a lot of places where ‘bad’ would be noticeable in the slightest.

Explain this to them then, I said. Tell them of Dyrena’s vision for the world she desired.

I would be glad to but I don’t see how that will answer our Blessed of Battle’s questions or allow her to plan for the disruptions which I gather will result from your present course of actions.

Just go ahead and let them know, I asked. I wanted to see if they independently came to the same conclusion I did. And let me know what Kalkit says okay?

I waited a few moments before Theia spoke up.

Care to kill me in while we wait?

I will but let’s see what the others take on it is, I said, the waiting driving me a little nuts.

Kalkit says, and I quote, ‘That’s not possible’, end quote, Helgon said and added. The others are not sure what you or Kalkit are referring to.

Ask them what is hanging over Mt. Gloria at the moment.

A sun? Oh. OH! The shock in Helgon’s voice was palpable and his next words came in no more than a whisper.

She’s still here.

“It’s not so bad Helgon.”

“They killed you. It’s exactly that bad.”

“It’s not so unexpected then.”

“Speak for yourself. I didn’t expect this at all.”

“Oh, please. We spoke of this. I told you this would happen.”

“But not to you.”

“Yes to me. To me first, to me most certainly.”

“It shouldn’t have.”

“Do you think so? Do you think after what we did, what we allowed to happen, we somehow deserve better?”

“The rest of us? No, certainly not. But you did.”

“Helgon, dearest Helgon, I bear more responsibility for what occurred than you ever could.”

“But it was my theorems, my formulae, my machinery, they were the foundation for all of this. And they turned those on you.”

“Do you think so? Do you think after the long hours we’ve spent together, I was unaware of the reach of your contrivances? That I somehow missed the peril and potential they encompassed?”

“No. No of course not. But does that mean…?”

“That this is all a trick? I am afraid not my dear Helgon. Or at least not one from which I will return to this world from.”

“But you are here, now, can’t you remain? Just a little longer?”

“Tarrying is not for me. There is more that awaits me, so much more than we’d ever guessed. I am unbound from the concerns I once carried. Mostly.”

“Mostly?”

“One or two ties remain, but, alas, that which calls me onward has a gravity which will not be denied. And should I try, I fear I would do terrible harm.”

“We’ve already done terrible harm, what’s a tiny bit more?”

“What we wrought has changed the world, but life remains and hope persists. Where I to return…”

“And when my time comes?”

“We are not the same. The shape of my existence is not the shape of yours. Perhaps you will follow as well, or perhaps you shall have the time and solitude you have always craved. That will be for you to say.”

“I should never want so much time or so little of your company.”

– Helgon and Dyrena’s “last” goodbye, apart from the laughter which remained to tease Helgon and keep him company through a century of empty nights.

I could easily imagine why a Neoteric Lord might want to die. The sheer guilt they had to feel, assuming any feelings remained to them, had to be overwhelming. That wasn’t what Helgon was telling me though. His friend Dyrena had not chosen to die because of the regret she felt for her actions.

“It’s not your plan. It’s hers.” I wasn’t asking a question, though I didn’t know for certain that my statement was true.

“I think she would have enjoyed meeting you,” Helgon said. “I also suspect she would deny that the plan you speak of was solely hers. She would go on and on about how no scheme or work which involved others, especially posthumously, should ever fully be attributed to its initial architect.”

“But she was the one who set the current course of events in motion?” I felt like I could just glimpse the shape of what the Neoteric Lord Dyrena’s plan had been. 

A grand scheme to support and develop those who had every reason to destroy the Lords who’d destroyed her.

Revenge was a motive which featured in a lot of performances of tales from the old world. The First Tender encouraged that since it reinforced his narrative that we, the Chosen Survivors, were due our vengeance against the immoral masses whose profanity had led to the destruction of the old world. We were the oppressed ones. We were the ones who’d been made to suffer. We were the ones with a unique moral position, and the right to demand vengeance against those who’d wrong us.

That wasn’t Dyrena. It couldn’t be. Anyone who could weave a plan that would hang together a century or more after their death, would have to have seen that death coming far before hand (which Helgon seemed to think was possible) and therefor would have been able to form an even better scheme to prevent it and punish those responsible first.

She hadn’t.

She’d allowed for her own death for some reason, and set in motion a plan that was going to undo her fellow Neoteric Lords when they’d grown sloppy enough to miss the machinations which were moving against them.

“While I remain endlessly impressed by her prowess, I feel I must temper your expectations somewhat,” Helgon said. “Dyrena’s ‘plans’ were rarely as specific as you might imagine. As you say, she set certain events in motion. She also established caches of resource and ensured that weaknesses of the other Neoterics were recorded for those who chose to act against them. She did not, as a rule, provide specific instructions or dictates for those who effected her desires though.”

“Caches of resources?” I asked. It wasn’t the most important thing Helgon had said, or the most surprising, but it was something I could see an immediate use for, and something the others might not be fully aware of.

“Nothing so grand as weapons to outfit an army, I’m afraid,” Helgon said. “Dyrena saw little use for those. Far more often she would squirrel away a small trove of books. Or perhaps a single jewel which might have value when it was needed most. She had remarkable foresight for gathering things of actual value.”

“And you know where these caches are?” I felt a tension rising in my nerves the was powerful enough to lift me onto the tips of my toes. 

“Only ones which had long since been looted,” Helgon said, wandering over to one of the pieces of wall art which turned out to be a rather stylized map of the old world.

Country names and borders I’d never heard before were illuminated as he swept his ghostly hand past them.

“I know of a dozen places on each continent where she left troves which have helped those who stumbled on them over the decades. They rarely contained what seemed to be most needed but I can’t recall them ever failing to be useful.”

“Useful for what?” I asked, trying to grasp what Dyrena’s true aim was, since revenge was simply too small a goal.

“Preservation, usually. Only the very desperate tend to locate one of her troves.”

“Desperate to escape one of the other Neoterics?”

“Not universally. Some of the ones I know of had already escaped their local Neoteric, though that is the minority by far.”

“And you?”

“There was no cache left behind for me,” Helgon said, his voice going softer and slower with each word.

“What about ones left for those fleeing from you?” I asked.

He turned to look at me, confused for a moment, before a small smile slip his lips and he shook his head.

“No one ever needed to escape me,” he said.

“Because they all died with your city before they could?” I asked, knowing that couldn’t have been right.

“I believe my fellow Neoteric imagined that to be the case. It’s likely why they thought I wouldn’t strike against them, for fear of ‘injuring my people’.”

From the inflection he put on naming ‘his people’ I understood what he was really saying.

“You didn’t have any people? Wait, you didn’t save anyone from the Sunfall?” I asked, processing what the would have meant for those who’d lived in his city at the time.

“There were those who suspected that as well,” he said. “Of course I didn’t let them check. Our domains are sacrosanct by treaty and by the divine power of our rule.”

“What would they have found if they had checked? What did you do?” There was some missing element to what was going on, some part of the Dyrena’s plan which Helgon had been privy to which was crucial but it eluded me.

“I did just what Dyrena knew I would. Just what she argued had to be done.”

“Which was!?”

“Nothing which can be spoken of. Not yet.” Helgon wasn’t being a jerk simply for the sake of being annoying. 

But he was enjoying being cryptic.

Which was definitely annoying.

“We could mess up her plans, and yours,” I said. “Without even meaning to. In fact we’re almost certain to! If we don’t know what’s you’re doing, what you’ve done, and we know you were a part of the whole Sunfall thing, we almost have to, don’t we?”

“If you could undo what we did with the overthrow of the gods, you cannot imagine how I would rejoice, much less how she would have,” Helgon said. “If I might offer some advice though, destruction is far simpler than creation, and creation is often far simpler than restoration. As much as I miss the days of yore now that they are lost to me, bringing back what was will never be the wisest path.”

“Because restoring what was would mean restoring a world set to destroy itself all over again.”

“A quote from the philosopher Valshama? Apparently Sasarai supplied a surprisingly more thorough education than I would have credited him with providing!” 

“Valsha-who? No, I wasn’t quoting anyone. That just made sense.”

“Huh. You would be surprised at the company you could keep with that sort of ‘sense’,” Helgon said. 

“Not with Dyrena it seems. I can’t see what her goal was, or what her plan would be leading us to?”

Having him simply tell me didn’t seem right. In part it would mean trusting him, which I wasn’t entirely sure we could afford to do. For as nice as he seemed, and despite the help he’d already provided us against Sasarai, there was still the possibility that he held plans which wouldn’t be to our benefit. I couldn’t see that, but then neither the gods nor the people of his time had seen that he was part of a cabal which would destroy their world, so staying wary while accepting the help that we clearly needed seemed like the wisest course of action I could choose under the circumstances. 

Also, it just felt better to figure things out my own. I’d been praised enough as being a good student, that valuing myself for my intelligence seemed to have stuck in my personality somewhere, even with the mound of data that suggested I was a complete idiot for worshipping Sasarai as I had.

“I can help you there, but I am certain I cannot provide a definitive answer for you,” Helgon said. “Don’t mistake me, at this juncture I would enjoy nothing more than assisting you in whatever course you might take against Sasarai and the others. Unlike Dyrena, my delight at the prospect of their downfall is more than enough to allow me to linger on here. That said, I can do no more than provide assistance to you because I do not trust that I understand the full extent of her plans myself.”

“She didn’t talk about them with you? Not even hints?”

“Oh, no, no, we spoke of our goals and plan quite extensively. The problem isn’t that she didn’t tell me her plans, its that she told me so many of them and spoke at length of the value of them all that I am quite sure she managed to obfuscate what she actually intended far beyond my ability to determine which she eventually chose to implement and which she chose to forego.”

“Could she have just done them all?”

“She was a singular genius, so perhaps I shouldn’t rule that out, but had she brought to life all the dreams she spoke of, we would be sitting in a very different world.”

“Tell me about that then,” I said, grasping at whatever threads I could.

“Dyrena’s world? Hers would have been an unfallen realm. Different from the world before, with power stripped away from people like myself and her and most certainty from the other would-be Neoteric Lords. In place of an eternal night, we would live beneath a life giving sun and stars which listened to the wishes made upon them. Old feuds would have been forgiven, and ancient sins accounted for. I thought she meant to make a world of love and brotherhood, but she laughed at that too. ‘People will always be people’ she’d said. She didn’t wish to deny them that, merely give us the vision to see each other as flawed but still worthy of redemption, should we choose we it.”

And I saw it.

It wasn’t possible. It couldn’t be possible. Not after all this time..

But…

“I need to go to Mt Gloria.”

“Now?”

“Yes,” I said, my voice dropping as my body began to change and Draconia’s power flooded through me.

With the beat of wings as wide as a building, I rose into the starless sky and with my god flew towards the life giving sun.

“So, tell my Dyrena, what sort of paradise do you plan to create?”

“I won’t be creating a paradise at all Helgon. Quite far from it in fact.”

 “I am not sure I take your meaning. Certainly you can’t mean to organize a hell for your survivors to suffer in, can you? That seems terribly out of character.”

“And what might you imagine my character to be?”

“I should hesitate to say, lest you find the admiration displeasing.”

“Unfounded admiration can be tedious, and in these days I find little admirable anywhere I look.”

“Events do seem to be trending in a more dire direction than our first conversations suggested.”

“Yes. Then it was hypotheticals. Ideas untarnished by confrontation with reality.”

“Would you have us stop then?”

“It is far too late for that. You’ve seen what has happened to the others who raised their voices in opposition. Those who remain in our circle are no longer capable of choosing anything but destruction.”

“Destruction which can be turned to the service of a new creation though, no? Is that not still the goal we all strive towards?”

“In name? Most certainly. It will be a creation designed by those who would see the world burn to light their path to power though, so what can be created but the most exquisite of hells?”

“Not all of us crave power though. Innovation need not only benefit the one who innovates.”

“Perhaps not, but will it benefit any of those sacrificed to see it come to pass?”

“It would not, no more than it can benefit those who die in the senseless conflicts of today.”

“And for you, moral neutrality is achieved by virtue of the mortality of those to be sacrificed. They were going to die anyways, so what does it matter.”

“As you say, we cannot save them, but at least striving towards a future where prosperity can be the domain of all holds some nobility over one where all are designed to suffer.”

“Which is why they will destroy you before overlong. And why they will destroy me first.”

“What other paths are open to us then?”

“Perhaps none, or perhaps one that none have dared walk before.”

– High Accessor Dyrena wavering on the precipice of explaining her master stratagem to Helgon.

I didn’t have a family anymore. They were gone. They weren’t mine. They’d chosen to let me go.

That was what I woke up to banging around in my head.

“Jilya, you okay?” Kam asked, rousing in his chair beside my bed. “If you need more sleep, it’s fine. The ghost guy said to take as long as need. All that healing you did was a lot I guess.”

I looked around the room.

We weren’t in a pod (which was relief), but I had no idea whatsoever where we were (which was not a relief). Notable elements of the room included stacks of books (interesting), wall art in styles I’d never even heard of much less seen before (frightening in some cases, gorgeous in others), and the aroma of recently applied cleaning chemicals. Conspicuously absent however was any sign of my mother or father.

“Where are they? What happened?” I asked.

“Ghost guy, Helgon I think? He’s got them in some lab room he said.” Kam sounded pretty disinterested in something that raised the most piercing of distress cries in my head.

Helgon, one of the Neoteric Lords, destroyer of the world that had been, had my parents in a laboratory?

“What. Is. He. Doing. With. Them.” I felt Draconia’s fire rising within me with each word.

He is not referring to your parents, Draconia said before the misunderstanding lead to a new calamity. Helgon and the other Blessed are in one of his meeting rooms revising their earlier strategy. Your parents have departed with the other refugees from Low Town.

“They left?” I said and amended my question to remove the confusion ambiguity. “Our parents, they left?”

“Oh, yeah. They’re going on to some place called Mt. Gloria. It’s supposed to be safer there.”

“And you stayed?” That made almost no sense at all.

“Uh, yeah, obviously.”

“Why?” I didn’t mean to be rude but, seriously, why would he?

“You were out. Someone needed to look after you.” Kam sounded as confused as I was, leaving me to wonder if we were actually capable of communicating with one another.

Except for the part where he was still mine?

He was?

It surprised me as well, Draconia said. But people are surprising sometimes.

“What about mother? Or father?” I asked, already knowing the answer, absolutely not wanting to hear the answer, and just as absolutely incapable of avoiding it.

“They…uh.” Kam didn’t want to repeat what they’d said. 

Because it would hurt my feelings. 

As though I didn’t already know.

As though I hadn’t heard the hate in their voices for the very idea of sinning against the Holy Tree or the First Tender.

As though I could possibly be unaware of the abomination I had become in their eyes.

“They left me. Did they leave you too?” I asked, the answer to that question somehow even more painful than the answer to the first.

“No. They wanted me to stay with you. They knew you needed someone.”

They did?

“What did they say?” I asked, fairly certain that Kam had misheard or misunderstood them.

“I mean, not much, the train was leaving pretty quickly. A whole bunch of folks wanted to stay and thank you but Helgon kind of shoved them on to the other train and told them they’d see you again in Mt. Gloria once you’d recovered.”

My parents hadn’t been planning on that. I could feel it.

They’d left because they were drowning in confusion and couldn’t bear to see what I’d become. 

But they’d left Kam.

Their precious Kam.

That didn’t make sense.

Sometimes things don’t. As you say, they were lost in confusion, they’re whole world shattered before them. Trust me when I say that can lead to some seemingly inconsistent decisions.

Seemingly? I asked.

That they left says something, that they left your brother says something as well, if those seem contradictory it likely means that the situation is more complex or nuanced than they or you can fully see. Give it time. That may not make anything better, but it will makes things clearer I believe.

Which left me with the question I really did not want to ask myself; did I want things to be clearer? Did I want them to be better.

They’d left me. Even if that was only to make sense of the new life and world before them, could anything, and did I even want anything, to change the fact that they’d left.

If they appeared in the doorway saying ‘oh my daughter, we are so sorry, can’t we just forget it and go back to the family we were’, would I say yes?

No. 

I couldn’t.

The bond we’d had, the one that let me pull them from the scene of their execution, they’d walked away from that and in doing so revealed it to be a lie. A lie I’d believed enough to   work magic through, but one I could never cling to again.

“Hey, it’s okay,” Kam said, reaching over and hugging me.

Hugging me? What? Why?

Oh. I was crying. 

Stupid eyes.

I wanted to push him away. He wasn’t supposed to be nice to me. He was an idiot. And he got everything. And…

And I’d gotten him. He was my only family now.

So I hugged him back and stopped crying.

After a minute or two I stopped crying.

Stupid eyes.

Fortunately I was able to wipe my eyes off on his shirt a moment before the door to the room slid to the left into the wall and Theia leaned in.

“Umbrielle said you were up and wanted me to get you some food. I thought I’d check to see if you were feeling up for it though. Either of you.”

“Oh, I can definitely eat!” Kam said, because of course he could.

I checked in and found my own appetite…missing?

I can sustain you, Draconia said, you’ll enjoy eating more than divine sustenance though.

And with that the fact that I hadn’t eaten since my entire life collapsed came roaring in and out of my as my stomach protested the lengthy fast.

“I think I could start eating the walls here,” I said, unable to hide the embarrassing growl from my guts.

“I don’t know the Sylvan diet, but I can promise that Helgon’s cooks can come up with something you’ll like better than the walls,” Theia said, and leaned back out of door for us to follow her.

Kam trotted along right beside leaving me to bring up the rear as though they were some kind of honor guard clearing a path for me. I wasn’t thrilled with that image but I consoled myself with the knowledge that the only reason Kam was in front of me was because he wanted to get to the promised food first.

“Once you’ve had something to eat, we could use you in the debate room,” Theia said.

“Debate room? I thought Helgon had everyone in lab?”

“Everything here can double as lab space. Or a library annex,” Theia said. “Labs are where people get things done though, and we are definitely not getting anything done.”

“I thought you were setting up new plans?”

“Yeah. So did we,” Theia said and I could feel her eye roll of exasperation despite being behind her. “Our gods aren’t quite able to come to the agreement we’d been hoping though.”

Why anyone is surprised that Battle is hot headed astounds me, Umbrielle said.

Harvest has raised some interesting and compelling points, Draconia said, but I still hate their suggestion that we spend the next century growing a base to work from.

Theia glanced back at me with the clearest of expressions – ‘can you see what I’ve been dealing with’ and I had to wince in acknowledgement. If the main argument was between immediate action and long term plans, I could easily imagine the points each side was making, and could see value in ones which my heart just rebelled against.

I wanted Sasarai dead. He was a threat and his crimes were unforgivable. The sooner he was dead the better.

Sasarai was also immensely powerful though, and part of a delicate web entities who were all capable of annihilating the world again if they saw fit.

“I have no idea how I’ll be able to help there,” I said, a desire to stay as far away from that room as possible rising within me.

“I think they mostly want to see if they can build a consensus from a wider array of gods, or at least their fragments.” Theia said, turning to stroll backwards so she could talk to me directly.

“I thought the gods were dead?” Kam asked.

“They’re not,” I said at the same time Theia said “They are.”

“So I’m right and wrong?” Kam asked.

“Pretty much,” Theia said. “The gods of the Fallen World died, but bits of them are left behind, and are the heirs to the domains the gods had responsibility for. So they’re dead, just not dead like we’ll be someday.”

“Huh, okay, yeah so they’re like Mazana’s leaves then, like not the full god, but a part of it that’s still got that holiness and stuff.”

“That’s…” I started to say not how it worked, but on reflection, it was a lot closer than I’d expected Kam to ge to understanding things, “not precisely right, Mazana’s not a god it turns out – more like a big bucket – but yeah, otherwise I think that’s right, isn’t it?”

I glanced over to Theia for confirmation, but Helgon was the one who answered since he was waiting for us as we stepped into the kitchen 

“For cursory explanation, this is splendid. Completely wrong as well, though that is an artifact of the limitations of our mortal languages which we all must labor under. Fortunately for you, there is a path to greater clarity if you should desire!”

“Years of study?” I guessed.

“That is always ideal,” Helgon said. “In this case I was considering something more expedient however, to wit, rather than explaining your Blessed state, have you considered asking the myriad of divinities you carry if any of them would share their blessing with him?”

“It is fascinating how effective punishments based around social rejection can be with Sylvans!”

“Yes, Sasarai.”

“I developed an experimental study you see, dividing up a small population into two groups.”

“I am aware of basic methodology Sasarai.”

“Of course you are Dyrena, but you see for the first group I made sure that any misdeeds were met with stern corporal punishments, as I’d intended to utilize originally, and for the second group, I employed those same corporal punishments!”

“That seems rather…”

“On the offenders family members!”

“…in character. Yes, that comes as no surprise at all I suppose.”

“Can you imagine the results.”

“Likely better than you can.”

“Why the second group showed a nineteen percent reduction is doctrinal violations after a single week! This is so wonderful.”

“It is for someone I suppose.”

“I’d had a factor in my population graphs to account for all of the ones I was going to have to sacrifice as an example to keep the others in line. Or rather that the divine tree would exact retribution on. With this I can work with a smaller, more elite population and they’ll be even stricter about adhering to doctrine than planned! Oh thank you so much for the insight into working within the Sylvan social constraints, Dyrena. This is going to yield such a rich bounty!”

“Don’t mention it. Literally. I don’t want my name spoken of in relation to this ‘discovery’ at all.”

– High Accessor Dyrena gaining an understanding that she may have overestimated the intelligence of her co-conspirators.

I’d never been present when a new Blessed was chosen by their deity, arguably not even when I was, since Draconia choosing me and my be aware of that fact were separate by a span measured in years. With Fiddler Jast though it was hard to miss the transition from ‘very much a dying Goblin’ to ‘Blessed of Small Problems’. That the sheer force of his investiture lifted him a good two feet into the air as his flesh reknit and and his bones all snapped back into their proper place was a tiny bit of a give away from the rest of the people in the car too.

“Woah!” Kam said, ever the master of eloquence and clarity.

To be fair to him, my own contribution to the ‘conversation’ was mute silence at first.

Was it like this with me, ever? I asked, sharing my thoughts only with Draconia.

For me? No. Not at all. I rejoiced quite a lot more when you appeared. From how Draconia spoke I was sure she was being serious but I couldn’t imagine how that would be true.

I don’t recall floating, I said.

That came later, Draconia said. In your case, you weren’t at death’s door nor had you been unimaginably imprisoned for the better part of two centuries. I had slightly more cause to rejoice than you did, you see.

And I did. All the years I called her my demon and she didn’t hate me because I had been freedom for her and even if she’d been a demon, she’s been MY demon.

“Thank you,” Fiddler said, or was it Fiddler and Polsguls? “We owe you…”

“Nothing,” I said before an inadvisable promise was made. Anything they owed me would be mine and owning someone’s promise would give me ownership over a piece of them. I’d pushed on that line a lot farther than I was comfortable with to save my family. I was not about claim dominion over a stranger who’d been in no position to refuse what I’d given to him.

No. We do…Polsfuls tried to put in directly, but Draconia shut him down like I had.

Small Problems, it is we who owe you. This offering of a Blessed cannot cover the loss of your peoples, but let is be a first step towards a renewed friendship.

As you would have it Guardian and Treasure, and I felt Polsgul’s presence withdraw to the normal intensity of the divine with the other Blessed.

“Hey, if you can do that again, we got a lot more injured here still,” Kam said.

True to his word, he was applying what first aid he could to a Crowkin whose left wing had been broken.

“I’m okay, this won’t kill me,” Iskil, the Crowkin said. “Help the others.”

“We will,” Fiddler and I said in unintended unison.

I looked to him for confirmation that he was capable of helping the others and he nodded.

“Not with serious wounds, but leave the little stuff to me,” he said.

‘Little’ in this case seemed to mean ‘not within minutes of dying’ and since there’d been a lot of incidental injuries as the assassins tore through the car, that meant there was plenty to keep him busy.

My skills on the other hand were needed for the people who were near death, and, unfortunately, they were not enough.

At least not on my own.

For these, we will need Diyas, Draconia said. She holds the Domain of Healers. You have one of her fragments, call on it if you can.

Calling on Diyas was both either and harder the Polsguls had been. Her power was in my hands before I fully thought about – because I’d followed her path as well, and bore a mundane version of her blessing already in my gifts.

With a need in front of us, the power of the God of Healers was all too happy to send grace coursing through me and help me manipulate it into the forms the injured needed.

I’m sure with each person I healed, there were sighs of relief and a chorus of appreciation, but I heard none of it. Draconia had stood aside to allow Diyas to work through me and my mind swam with a deeper understanding of bodies and their functions. With each person we healed I saw a river of cells, each little one marching around in a cycle of life, carrying every precious things the body needed. I felt issues, blockages, cuts and breaks and understood the ones we could leave for the body to heal itself and which would need a miracle to return to a state where the whole system wouldn’t collapse.

Everyone’s biology was so different, and yet to Diyas we were all barely noticeable variations on the same core template. Even the dead held lessons, though they lay beyond my or Diyas’ ability to restore.

I’m not sure how much time I spent in that strange, twilight state of knowing everything and being nearly divorced from the material world, but when it came to an end it came to an abrupt one.

The domain of healing I’d been wrapping within was yanked away from me, by someone with a greater claim. With Polsguls, I could have fought to prevent the Fiddler’s Blessing, stating my claim and backing it with Draconia’s power, but not so with Diyas.

Someone was already the Blessed of Healing and, while they had done me the courtesy of allowing me to call on Diyas for the injured and the dying around me, once that need was passed, theirs exerted itself.

I wished I could have communicated with them, but while I could feel their strength and purpose in the instant they called Diya’s fragment back to join the other fragments they held, where they were and even who they were was impossible to tell.

“You did good work there but I’m betting you’re…” Theia started to say only to interrupt herself so she could catch me as a toppled over, “…a bit of hand and some food.”

It was ridiculous. I hadn’t been using my own strength. Diyas had done as the real work. Despite that however, I was very definitely not capable of walking or even standing upright on my own. 

I felt consciousness yearning to slip away and my thoughts grew a trifle fuzzy.

Just like Theia.

Mmm.

Warm fuzzy thoughts against a warm fuzzy girl.

I felt my head nod forward and my knees buckle slightly.

“Need a hand? Be easier to carry her together,” Kam said, putting my other arm around his shoulder so I could dangle between the two of them.

“Probably a good idea. I’d hate to just drop her if more assassins show up,” Theia said, in a tone that told me she would probably drop me, kill all of them and still catch me before my head bonked on the floor.

“We should adjourn to my study,” Helgon said, “Or one of them at any rate. We have quite a few more guests than I’ve been used to entertaining lately.”

Helgon was here?

And we weren’t moving anymore?

I think I might have micro-napped for a moment or two.

But where were my parents?

“I’ve sent them on to their own rooms,” Helgon said. “There are some people they need to speak with.”

People? Who? They didn’t know anyone on the train. They couldn’t. 

“Is she going to be okay?” Kam asked. I wondered for a moment why he was concerned about my mother. Had she been hurt when I wasn’t looking?

Despite my fatigue though, a moment later I figured out that he was talking about me.

“I’m fine,” I said, shaking my head to throw away the fatigue that seemed to be piling up on me.

“No you’re not,” Theia said. “You healed thirty seven people without a break.”

“That wasn’t me,” I said. “It was Diyas.”

“Yeah. Using your body,” Theia said. “That kind of thing doesn’t come free.”

“I am honestly surprised you are as undamaged as you seem to be, though I suspect Diyas’s fragment wouldn’t have pushed you to the point of actual injury as that’s contrary to her role,” Helgon said.

“I’m fine. I’m used to healing. I was the best in my class,” I said.

“You were fourth, and you never healed the things you healed back there,” Kam said.

“We all tied for first,” I insisted, as though that was an important distinction, when he was, in fact correct. “I’m fine. What’s up with mother and father?”

“You’re fine? Okay you can walk on your own then right?”

Of course I could. 

That I was hanging helplessly on Theia a moment later as Kam ducked out from under my arm did not mean that he was right and I was wrong.

“One of the restoration pods then I should think,” Helgon said as Kam took my arm and half my weight from a smirking Theia.

“What’s a restoration pod?” I asked, unsure if I should be dreading what awaited me or welcoming it.

“An improved form of bedding,” Helgon said. “Newly refurbished too. I suppose ‘two’ isn’t a plethora of guests too exhausted to stand, but it’s a trend I am prepared for! Or rather, prepared for after the first one.”

“Don’t we need to talk about stuff? Sasarai stuff?” I asked, my fatigue only growing the farther I had to walk.

“We will,” Theia said. “We made out a lot better than any of us ever dreamed, so there’s a whole bunch of plans we need to review and reconsider. Most of them have nothing to do with the Garden or Sasarai though. Don’t worry, we’ll leave all that till you’re conscious again.”

Also, I will attend to the discussion while you recover, Draconia said, Rest in comfort and peace for now.

“Okay,” I said. “But what about my mother and father.”

“They’ll be here when you wake up,” Kam said. “You know them, they’re not going to want to go anywhere until they hear everything about everything.”

I heard him.

And I believed him.

But something told me he wasn’t right.

They were mine. I’d claimed them. That meant I could reach out and feel where they were, and how they were doing. I didn’t want to do that uninvited, but despite the fatigue, I had to know. I had to feel that they were okay. I had to…

They weren’t there.

They hadn’t died. They hadn’t been taken.

They just weren’t mine anymore.

They’d cast me out.