The problem with great plans is often that when they’re laid out for everyone involved to see, they sound a lot less great.
“You want me to do what?” Sali asked.
“Take command of all the ships in this system,” Nix said.
Ayli knew that her wife was mad – evidence aplenty existed, starting with their marriage. How Saliandris had missed that fact despite dating her for longer than Ayli and Nix had been married was the only puzzling thing at the planning table.
“All the ships which follow us to Praxis Mar,” Nix said, her cheer undiminished. “Which will probably be all of them. At least if I have anything to say about it.”
Sali steepled her fingers in front of her face and drew in a breath that seemed to fill her with nothing like the patience the situation required.
“And why, exactly and in detail, do we want the Preservationist League to follow us to Praxis Mar?” she asked.
“How else are you going to get a fleet?” Nix asked, looking puzzled as to why that reason wasn’t patently obvious.
Sali drew in another breath.
“I had a fleet,” she said. “A perfectly good one. They obeyed my orders at least half the time, which is half more I would like to point out than the Preservationists will be willing too.”
“You’re last fleet sucked,” Nix said. “No offense to them. Or you know, full offense I guess.”
Ayli could heard Sali’s teeth grinding and admired the big woman’s restraint at not grabbing Nix by the neck and squeezing for all she was worth.
“No, seriously, those idiots had no idea the windfall they lucked into having you as their leader,” Nix said. “I watched them remember? I saw all the cranky backtalk and the stupid whispering they did. Sure, some of them had a brain, but even those people didn’t get how valuable you were. They all thought they could do things better, and made it a point to make your life a living hell.”
Sali frowned but the tension in her neck muscles eased.
“Getting you to leave was absolutely for you, and I’ll stand by that,” Nix said. “But it’s also going to help them, because now all the would-be usurpers will have to put up or shut up.”
“Mostly of them are going to shut up because someone slit their throats,” Sali grumbled.
“And will the galaxy be a worse place for it?” Nix asked.
“You know, I mistook you for the nice one of this crew Lamplighter,” Zindiana said.
“A lot of people do,” Nix said. “I don’t know why?”
“We’re getting a bit off topic here,” Ayli said, with less than five hours remaining until Mr. Thirty-two and the rest of the Preservation League learned that the credentials Goldie had supplied to them were backed by smoke and imagination, they needed to begin implementing their scheme sooner than later.
“Right,” Nix said. “I promise though that getting Sali a fleet is an important part of the plan.”
“But you won’t tell us why?” Sali said.
“Yeah, because you won’t like it,” Nix said.
“I don’t like any of this,” Sali said.
“But you will!” Nix said. “You just have to trust me. Just a little bit.”
“The last time I trusted you, I got shocked so hard I was tasting Bacta packet goo for days,” Sali said.
“That time though I knew you wouldn’t like what I wanted to do,” Nix said.
“You just said I’m not going to like this either!” Sali said.
“Right, which is why I can’t tell you,” Nix said, clearly pleased that Sali was understanding her.
Ayli fought valiantly to keep the smile that was threatening to explode into laughter off her face. There was something about seeing Nix drive Sali mad that was deeply satisfying. Not that Ayli was intimidated at being compared to the near perfect physical specimen that was the pirate queen. It was just nice to know Nix liked her better than Sali.
“What’s the rest of the plan then?” Zindiana asked.
“You won’t like this part either,” Nix said. “Remember when I said we’d have the whole Preservationist fleet there if I had anything to say about it? Well, I will. Because I’ll be on the Destroyer they have.”
“Why and how?” Sali asked.
“The why is fairly simple,” Nix said. “That a refurb from the Galactic Civil War right?”
“Has to be, they haven’t made those in years,” Sali said. “Not since the Empire obliterate the Trade Federation’s leadership.”
“One thing I’ve seen on all the old TF ships, is that the command systems are still in place. They were so central to the design and so efficient that taking one out would basically involve building a whole new ship,” Nix said.
“Oh, that’s interesting,” Zindiana said.
“Isn’t it though?” Nix said, clearly pleased that someone was following her line of thought.
Ayli was as well but wasn’t as happy with where it was heading.
“You’re thinking you can take over the security droids with the controls on the command ship?” she asked, hating that it was even a possibility under the circumstances.
“I know I can take them over,” Nix said. “It’ll be a little tricky getting to the command deck, but the security on the main controller is decades out of date. I could rewire it with my eyes closed.”
“You don’t think they’ve changed it?” Sali asked.
“No one changes their security as often as they should,” Nix said. “And changing the security locks on a barge like that is a nightmare. Again, it’s like building a whole new ship. The Trade Federation believed in security through security droids, so the actual challenge was getting past things like destroyer droids.”
“They still have those,” Zindiana pointed out.
“But do I look like a threat?” Nix asked.
“Yes,” all three other women and Goldie answered together.
“I…I do not!’ Nix said. “I’m just a harmless mechanic.”
“You’re not one of them,” Ayli said. “They will absolutely consider you a threat the moment they see you onboard their command ship.”
“Oh, not if I’m there because they invited me though,” Nix said.
“They’re not going to invite you onboard their most secure vessel,” Sali said. “They’re not that stupid.”
“Of course they’re not,” Nix said. “Which is why they’re definitely going to invite me onboard their most secure vessel.”
Sali buried her head in her hands.
“You know, there used to be days when I was sorry that you’d left,” she said. “I would think ‘if only she’d come back’. Why was I cursing myself like that? Did I hate myself?”
“Probably a little,” Nix said. “I never did though.”
“That does not make it even a little bit better,” Sali said.
“It’s okay,” Nix said. “You’re on a better path now.”
Sali turned to look at Ayli.
“Run,” she said. “I’m apparently doomed by this madness but there’s still a chance for you.”
Ayli chuckled at that.
“I’m afraid not,” she said. “This whole mess was at least half my fault.”
“You have a strategy to get onto the Destroyer, don’t you?” Zindiana said, more as an accusation than a question.
“I have the shell of a strategy,” Nix said. “It’s based on some observations, things you’ve said, and, hopefully the results I’m expecting Goldie to turn up.”
“I don’t know if I want to share those with you Mom,” Goldie said.
“And now the ship’s like that too,” Sali said.
“You found something, didn’t you?” Nix asked.
“Maybe I did, and maybe I didn’t,” Goldie said. “I think I should tell the others first though because this plan sounds really bad to me.
“That’s because it is!” Sali said.
“Do you think if you don’t tell her, she’ll give up, or will she come up with a worse plan instead?” Ayli asked, ready to bet a mountain of credits on which of the two Nix was likely to pick.
Goldie was silent for a moment.
“That’s not fair,” she said eventually.
“Very little is,” Ayli agreed.
“Okay then, yes, I was able to find inspection requirements in the Preservation League bylaws,” Goldie said.
“And how far out of inspection is the Destroyer?” Nix asked.
“It’s not bad,” Goldie said. “It’s late by five weeks, but according to the public flight plans from Hillben Station, it’s due for a refueling stop there in three weeks.”
“Eight weeks? That’s perfect,” Nix said.
“Perfect how?” Sali asked.
“It means they keep a tight schedule on their ship inspections,” Ayli said, seeing where Nix’s plan was going.
“Yeah. Most ships go for six months to a year with out of date inspections,” Nix said. “Technically the Chief Mechanic’s logs can count as temporary inspection passes in most systems, but those tend to be hashed up too.”
“So you’re going to offer to write them a mechanic’s log?” Zindiana asked.
“No, I’m going to offer to give them a full inspection,” Nix said.
“Why would they care about that?” Sali asked.
“I’m sure Thirty-two doesn’t,” Nix said. “And I’m sure he’ll have a pretty good idea what I actually plan to do.”
“So he’ll want for you to board and shoot you then. Gotcha. Brilliant plan,” Sali said.
“Would you like to make a wager on that?” Nix asked with a dangerous gleam in her eye.
“I don’t bet with dead people,” Sali said.
“That’s good because I’m not going to die,” Nix said. “Thirty-two is going to welcome me with open arms to the Destroyer, and then lead me right to the command deck.”
“What’s the tricky part then?” Zindiana asked.
“Making sure no one else stops us,” Nix said.
“Can we go back to the part about the enemy welcoming you with open arms?” Sali said.
“Thirty-two’s not the enemy,” Nix said. “He, and all of the rest of the ‘involuntary work force’ are the best allies we’ve run across so far. Present company excepted of course.”
“It says something about us that they’re all convicted criminals doesn’t it?” Zindiana asked.
“It says more that she’s probably right,” Ayli said.
“I feel the need to point out that our ‘best allies’ are currently in charge of enough firepower to reduce us to space dust, and have not one but five different target locks on us,” Sali said.
“Not exactly true,” Nix said. “Thirty-two and the others don’t have the target lock on us. Their control collars do, in a manner of speaking.”
“Yeah, but they have to do what the…” Sali got that far in what she was saying before the full appreciation of the scenario hit her.
“Right. They have to do what the collars so. Which I why I’m going to turn those hideous things to scrap,” Nix said.
“Oh, that wasn’t what I was thinking you were going for,” Zindiana said.
“What else would I…oh, you thought I’d just take control of the system myself?” Nix said. “I mean, I suppose that’s part of the plan too, at least for the non-sapient droids. It’s just the thermo-collars that have to go.”
“You’re not going to have any control over them once you do that,” Ayli said, not in the slightest bit surprised at the direction Nix’s plan was heading. Contrary to Nix’s assertion, she was definitely the nicest of the four of them. Or five if Goldie’s willingness to blow up non-hostile ships was anything to go by.
“Of course not,” Nix said. “That’s what I need Sali for.”
“I’m not acting as a blaster shield for you,” Sali said.
“You know I would never ask that of you,” Nix said. “Your body is not one that should ever be ruined by blaster fire. I’m giving you a new crew. One that is going to listen to you because you’re going to let them do exactly what they want to do.”
“I am? And what would that be?” Sali asked.
“Live free,” Nix said.